Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

It has been said that people with ADHD can often hyperfocus. Can that be an advantage?

It’s still here.

The sadness was still there.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

Liquid Glass tvOS redesign is restricted to second-generation Apple TV 4K and later - AppleInsider

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

What does it mean when we dream about demons, ghosts, monsters, etc.?

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

What are some alternatives to wearing a bra? Why do some women feel pressure to wear bras even though there may not be any benefits?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

And the sadness?

It’s here now, writing to you.

Injuries force USMNT to make roster changes as the Gold Cup nears - The Washington Post

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

I was tired of fighting.

I had run out of hope.

What was your biggest culture shock going to Europe?

I was tired of trying and failing.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

Taylor Swift Wears a Bejeweled LBD for a Celebratory Girls Night Out with Selena Gomez - instyle.com

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Why do SpaceX rockets keep exploding? - The Verge

You are like me, then.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

Be who you already are.

Atheists who said that reading the Bible made them an atheist, how? Literally there are millions of people who read the Bible daily and still believe in God. So why say that? I mean unless you want to sound smart & edgy

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.